Today is day 4 of my 20-day silent meditation retreat.
At this point in the retreat, we’re still steadfastly following our breath, a technique known as anapana meditation. The basic idea is to beef up one’s concentration for the more advanced technique arriving on day 8.
I'm writing this at a cafe in Cape Town, well in advance of my retreat. It's strange projecting out like this. I'm getting this weird sense of vertigo, like I'm being pulled into the future (or perhaps the future is reaching back to touch me?) My mind is already quieting down just from anticipating the retreat, as if the silence has begun leaking backwards through time.
There's a peculiar intimacy in writing to you from a moment I haven't yet lived. Right now, in this cafe, I'm drinking OJ and people watching. But by the time you read this, that version of me will be four days deep in noble silence, perhaps experiencing something I can't possibly imagine.
I suppose there’s nothing really else to say at this point. Keep sending those loving thoughts my way; the mind will be very calm at this point, so perhaps your well wishes will reach me a bit easier.
Anyways...I hope you enjoy this week's {Body} • {Mind} • {Soul} Newsletter and have a beautiful Sunday, - Ethan ॐ
Ethan Hill Owner, Yoga with Ethan
Unable to display emotions Originally published on February 25, 2024
We take displaying emotions very personally, as though they defined our very essence.
If you cry, you’re weak. If you’re angry, you’re a b*tch. If you’re afraid, you’re faithless.
And yet…you don’t confuse bouts of diarrhea or vomiting as being a part of your character, do you?
Of course not! They are seen as natural processes for getting toxic gunk out of your body.
So why is it that we believe emotional outbursts (crying, screaming, punching, trembling, etc.) are more telling of who we are?
Perhaps it is because of the many subconscious cues we receive from others:
Frustration directed towards us as children when we had temper tantrums.
Discomfort we saw in our peers’ eyes when we cried in front of them.
Judgement we felt while vocalizing our fears to a group of strangers.
When you start to see your emotions as impersonal as breathing or digesting food, they will be much easier to ride and feel.
Practice Step-by-step instructions to turn theory into healing.
Why do bad things happen to innocent children? Originally published on May 19th, 2024
Christians tell us that it is because of the fall.
Hindus give us the story of reincarnation and the law of karma.
Atheists says it’s all luck of the draw.
Capitalists points to inefficiencies in the market.
The woke blame elites at the top of the social hierarchy.
It’s not that any of these answers are wrong — it’s just that hearing them is not enough.
You don’t want to believe. You don’t want to have faith. You want to know.
Unfortunately, dualistic words can’t convey the full logic of how, despite all the misery and evil out there, that God is Good.
For instance, I could try to explain that suffering exists only to point the small fragmented ego back towards True Identity. Or that we are here because we chose to be here. But it wouldn’t do anything for you. Intellect will not — indeed, cannot — make your life any more meaningful, nor answer the existential questions nagging you day in and day out.
Sure, existentialism can be temporarily relieved through ancient scripture, textbooks, gurus, or conventional wisdom. But it will always leave you wanting more. And that’s because these are answers coming from outside of you.
No, if you want Truth — if you’d like to know God and the nature of righteousness — you must look deep within. There is no other way.
Meditate Bite-sized audios to help you become the master of your mind.
No practice this week – thanks for understanding 🙏🏻
“Not all elements of synchronicity are pleasurable. Not every element of a divine plan feels good.” — Teal Swan Originally published on June 23rd, 2024
Sometimes the fastest way to get to your destination is actually through a dense jungle filled with sharp thorns and venomous snakes.
Indeed, often it’s only way to get to your destination.
That’s not to say that the trail isn’t worth blazing, though. If you knew with certainty that your desires were on the other side of this temporary journey, and that God were walking beside you during the entire trek, I am confident you would still choose to sacrifice your comfort for them.
Remember: in the material world, effects come after their causes, not before. You shall have your peace and joy and fulfillment once you’ve properly battled and slayed your demons, not a moment sooner.
Journal Contemplative questions on the nature of inner freedom.
No journal this week – thanks for understanding 🙏🏻